Being the mum of a child with autism is tough, and it can be made harder by the thoughtless comments and judgments that other people often make.
It may be a case of people just not knowing enough about autism, which is fine but some comments are insensitive and some are just plain rude. Here’s a few that I’ve come across so far…
1. “He looks fine to me”
Firstly, just spending a few minutes with him isn’t going to give you an accurate picture of what he is like all the time and the daily struggles that we face. Secondly, he IS fine. He isn’t ill, there is nothing ‘wrong’ with him. His brain just works in a different way to yours or mine.
2. “Will he grown out of it?”
Erm, no. He was born this way, it’s who he is. Yes of course he can learn ways to cope with it but he isn’t going to simply grown out of it.
3. “He just needs discipline”
He isn’t being naughty, he doesn’t need disciplining. I can understand how it may appear to anyone who doesn’t know him or know much about autism. But believe me, he isn’t behaving the way he does through a lack of discipline.
4. “What makes you think he’s autistic?”
There isn’t really anything wrong with asking this, it’s cool if you’re genuinely interested in autism and want to know more about it. But it’s just one of those questions that I get asked A LOT and I don’t always feel like reeling off a list of all his autistic quirks.
5. “But he makes eye contact”
Yes he does, occasionally,but most of the time he will look to the side of you or off into the distance. He isn’t incapable of making eye contact, it just isn’t comfortable for him. He will sometimes make eye contact with you very very briefly but that doesn’t mean that he isn’t autistic, a lack of eye contact is NOT a requirement for an autism diagnosis.
Thank you for reading.